You just have to go with the flow!

Today we have been sifting through shelves of well thumbed books, photo albums, maps and treasures from times past, collected menus, travel tickets, little souvenirs etc....

Shall we take that, store this, charity shop that or bin the other?

Its quite a tough call letting go of some things that evoke some wonderful memories of great times shared but with our move just weeks away now it is a necessary task.

Whenever we have had a special holiday I have always tried to keep a journal, yes you always remember the over all experience but you do forget the detail and today I picked up a journal I had written back in 2005.

I opened a page and read an extract, it instantly transported me back there. There was one especially  poignant detail, that I now remember being a little bitter sweet at the time. If I could have gone back and told my 35 year old me, it will work out just fine I would have done.

I would like to share this excerpt with you.

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11th - 23rd November 2005 - Coco Palm, Maldives

 ".........we woke up this morning to grey skies and rain clouds but it was still very hot. We really hoped the rain would pass, firstly because we had booked a private BBQ on the terrace of our villa over looking the Indian ocean, just the two of us, well almost, a Chef and Waiter too! Secondly we hoped the rain would pass because a Japanese couple were to be married today and we wanted the sun to come out and bless their union.

It did. We watched the bride embark the Maldovian Dhoni boat to sail off to married life where the ceremony was to be held on the nearby Embudhoo Atoll. Her dress was a rich creamy silk and she had orchids in her hair. The only odd thing about her attire were the Abba style white, patent platform boots she wore beneath her dress!

As we returned to the villa our Chef, Indiga and out Waiter, Jackson were politely waiting for us by the door. We cleaned our sandy feet in the water urn and padded barefoot into the villa.

Walking out onto the terrace, a truly lovely sight unfolded before our eyes. A table delicately dressed with candles, orchids and foliage from the tulip tree, leaves entwined in a twirling pattern around the circumference of white cloth.

Then we noticed the BBQ tucked away on some decking just below the splash pool. It was throwing eager, dancing orange flames and our Chef, Indiga, stood proud in his pristine starched whites with a smile as bright and clearly relishing his moment on stage. Jackson, our Waiter was equally as smiley, asking us the same questions that every staff member does here.

"Where you from?"

"First time Maldives?"

"How long you stay?"

"You like?"

Conversing with mirth in truncated pigeon English, we all got along fine, Jackson cracked open a bottle of ice cold Chablis, we clinked, lent back into our chairs and gazed dreamily out to the watery horizon and bid the sun goodnight.

Jolted from my reverie, Jackson handed me our evenings menu, the words jumped off the page.

"In Villa BBQ for Mr & Mrs Tamble"

I smiled inwardly at their charming typo of our name and at the same time felt a little sting of tears too. Why? Because I was no longer a Mrs, not a Mrs T-J and not even a Mrs Tamble.

"Name right?" Jackson enquired

"Just perfect" I smiled.......................................

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I did wonder at the time if that holiday would produce the question ensuring a future reinstatement of Mrs T-J. But it didn't.

I had to wait another 2 years for that and it was worth every second for that holiday in Botswana 2007 not only saw a popping of the question but a surprise wedding too!

So where is the moral in the story?

I think looking back at my journal the lesson that constantly reinforces itself in my life is this:

Let life flow just as it should. If you try to force things, you push your life down tributaries it isn't meant to go down and you lose the flow and direction of the mighty river of life.

Be patient and go with the flow and things just work out fine in the end.

With love and light. Mrs Tamble xxx

What is your secret?

"Well what is your secret?" she inquired

"I really would never have known that about you, you just dont exude that stuff"

Well its no big secret at all, truly. For me it is a choice, a conscious one and actually very, very simple to practice, that is once you have decided you want to.

However hurt you're feeling, no matter how much you have been hurt, - hide the secret scar because time really does bring it's healing. Just see things for what they are.

I try to be forgiving, - loving more, not less. Life after all is for living and for packing in happiness.

Thats it, my secret, simple really, although I do have to remind myself of my own mantra because life is testing.

A word of caution, just because some people make it look easy, doesnt mean it is! No-one has it easy.

Untitled, just is!

The best time to make friends is well before you need them, so they say, so I suppose that means, all of the time really. I have always tried to open the door to friendship, some doors I have quickly closed again, some doors eventually and some never............ever.

A true friendship cant be broken, weakened or strained but it can be tested. Life is a test tho isnt it? I am not sure what the final qualification is or when we know we have achieved it. All I know is one thing and one thing I strive for in this life above all else is, to love and be loved. To know truly what both of those things mean and know I lived my life that way is the essence for me. I know this is important, my Dad told me so.

The last few weeks have been quite tough on a personal level, no need to elaborate further, as its all a bit tedious and of course relative, whats tough for me would not be tough for many of you, or indeed many in plight all over the world.

Funny how you learn who come forth to turn the difficult pages with you and those that retreat into the shadows....for whatever reason. Its all purposeful.

I still marvel at this journey, no experience is wasted. None.

My love is home tomorrow.

Think of what one heart is capable of, then be amazed at what two together can achieve.

I am ready for the adventure baby.

Officially need to be an Air Head!

Its not that I dont have anything to say.

I have too much to say.

Lots going on, lovely things, fun things, challenging things, emotional things, practical things and plenty more of to-do things......... The head is busy.

I need the seeds of creativity to germinate and unfurl through the vestiges of my thoughts, feelings, sights, sounds, smells and taste. With no head room they sit there, in hope of ..... not water but air. Air is space and space is room and there is none in my head.

Our new home is directly opposite here!

When I have so much going on, it leaves no head room.

I love writing but I now realise I need head room to do it.

So I am going to confirm a long held impression of blondes and prove it right, in order to function at optimum, I have to be an AIR HEAD innit!

"20 years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didnt do than the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbour, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover"
Mark Twain

Believe there is another dimension

Cast your mind back, its 5th September 2010, Coco Palm Bodhu Hithi, the Maldives the day after I heard the news my Father had passed away

My Father had always wanted to try scuba diving, in fact he had booked a holiday in Egypt to do just that in the February but sadly that was one trip he was never going to make.

Keen to keep busy, Gareth and I went out for an early morning snorkel, a good time to do it before the sun becomes too fierce.

Within minutes of reaching the edge of the reef before dropping away to the deep blue, I was aware of a large and beautiful fish, resplendent in vibrant electric blue and gold stripes. It swam very close to me, and nose to nose we looked at each other. Gareth looked on the encounter.

Emperor Angel Fish, Just like the one that stalked me!

It had the sweetest face and it's mouth looked like it was permanently puckered for a kiss. This very fish continued to follow me closely for 40 minutes, I was amazed as was Gareth, as I have never experienced this before ever but I was very happy to have him with me!

Just for fun, I tried to shake him off by striking out with my flippers at full pelt but every time I thought I had lost him I would look left, then right and there he was again. Unbelievable.

It didnt want to follow Gareth. It was clearly following me.

Now shoals of fish are know to follow you when you are in scuba gear because they adore playing in the bubbles from your regulator and that is such a wonderful interaction to experience. But I wasnt in scuba gear, I was just snorkelling.

Shoals of fish love to play in a diver's bubbles from his regulator

Once back in the villa, I produced my book "Fish of the Maldives" and identified my stalker as an Emperor Angel Fish.

That afternoon we did go scuba diving and as we headed out on the boat with the dive master, I told him about my encounter with the Emperor Angel Fish.

"Oh no I dont think that would have been an Emperor" he said "You must have that wrong, they are very shy"

"Well this one was far from shy he followed me for 40 minutes"

The Dive Master laughed and said "Erm I dont think so!"

Gareth also supported my story and I described the fish to him.

"Well I am not saying your story isnt true but what I am saying is that it couldnt have been an Emperor" he insisted a tad irritated. ( well who am I to question his authority and knowledge)

We left it at that. But we both know it was and I felt that if this fish really was so shy by nature then surely I had been given a very special gift.

Now let me remind you of the date of this encounter. The day after my Father's death.

Then that night at dinner I had a EUREKA moment!!!

"Gareth, Gareth"  I gulped "That fish was either my Dad or a message from my Dad!"

"How much wine have you had Debbie?"

"No listen, I have just remembered Emperor in Tarot means Father. Today my Father was with me "The Father Angel". He never got to dive with the tropical fish as he so wanted to do so he was with me there and he is happy at peace, all is ok"

Call it coincidence, call it what you like but I know what I believe and remember what the Dive Master said, these fish are shy, well my Dad never was!

Getting rid of Dreams

I’ve been cleaning out my wardrobe.

And I’m getting rid of a lot.

Of dreams.

Not because they are too big.

Not because they are too small either.

But because they aren’t right for me.

Here we are, at the beginning of a new year. Arguably, we begin a new year every day dont we?

So, in this week of celebration and contemplation I have spent some time reviewing my dreams.

They looked a lot like my wardrobe often looks – some areas on the rail crowded with bright colors  while other spots show gaps where my favorite wear-so-often-they-never-make-it-back-to-the-rail pieces are supposed to be.

Fancy-cocktail dresses are hung at the far end where they are seldom noticed, while walk-the-dog hoodies snuggle up to comfy sofa day jumpers and joggers.

I gave myself the same challenge I periodically use to clean out my wardrobe – “If you haven’t worn it in a year, if you don’t like the way it looks on you, if it worked for that one occasion but that occasion won’t ever come again, should it be taking up space in here?”


But the time comes – I have to let them go.

Because, really, that burnt orange shade is hideous on me.

That flouncy cocktail dress is pretty, but I don’t know where I would wear it.

That jacket looks good, but I’m always fussing with the sleeves.

That old thing really IS an old thing – it’s worn thin now and no miracle will make it look good again.

When I purge my wardrobe I let go of anything that doesn’t serve me, whether it fits me or doesn’t.

Time to do the same with my dreams.

That dream that someone else thought was perfect for me? Gone.

The one I so wanted to believe was real, until I saw the “faux” on the label? (That’s okay for leather and fur, but NOT okay for dreams.) Gone.

So what is left?

The true dreams. Not the dreams already come true, but the dreams that are truly mine.

Are some of them too big for me now? Probably. But I love them enough to try and grow into them.

Are some of them so bright and bold that I have a moment of doubt, wondering if others will judge me for choosing them? Of course. But I love how I feel when I wear them, and that is the only judgment that matters.

..............by Debbie Tamblyn-Jones

Are some of them a little revealing? Sure. But I have nothing to hide.

I’m keeping only the dreams that make me feel good, that make me feel like the me I like best. I’m keeping the dreams that make me feel like dancing, like running, like jumping for joy.


Everything else has to go.

Because when you choose your dreams, it isn’t about dreaming big.

It’s about dreaming true.

For you.

A New Year Letter to Me

Dear 8 year old me

 

Take a chance & dont let go, risk everything knowing in the end you lose nothing, don't worry about anything anymore, cry in the rain and speak up, say what you want and love who you want ...  but most of all be yourself and not what people want to see, never blame anyone if you get hurt because you took the rise & you decided who was worth your while. ♥ 

Its 2012 in just one hour and you know, you are ok, more than in fact. What a journey girl! Hold tight there is more to come, you never thought it for one minute did you? But you are having a life you could never have imagined, the good and the crap too. Its part of that tapestry you know and I know you understand that now. The Yin and the Yang is the Circle of life.

This is your mid life Chapter, lets hope to reflect back in our 90's when we really dont give a monkeys and batty is ultra cool.

Love 42 year old me! xxx

 

Christmas is LOVE

Well what can I say, for the first time ever in my life I can honestly say that Christmas was a bit eclipsed by the Ozzie Factor!

Christmas in Melbourne

We partied a plenty, we drank bubbles, we enjoyed a wonderful and very special  time with the family but the spirit of Christmas, although it threatened and I wanted it so much, failed to reach that bit of my tummy that gives me excited butterflies.

Melbourne you stole the Christmas I have come to know as far back as I can remember.

However, its ok its not about the paper and frippery, the sillly hats and tinsel really is it? A lesson was reinforced for me this year because it really was all about LOVE.

The most beautiful gift of all was in abundance from friends and family all around.

Clearly even the Radders mind was on all things "upside down" this year!

This Christmas involved a funeral and a wedding and at both LOVE was in the air in bucket fulls and I felt all of it.

Me and Hubster just exchanged cards this year, no gifts but the words he wrote in my card I will treasure always and never forget, full of LOVE.

We went out with some dear friends and part of our chat went like this and I will never forget its simple truth. 

"Do you remember all the gifts you have been given over the years?"

"Often we dont from one year to the next"

"But you do remember who you were with, the laughter and LOVE and the good times you shared"

Indeed you do.

As we prepare for a new chapter in our lives, one thing I can promise you is that next Christmas I will remember the one gift that didnt come wrapped up in tissue and bows but was given to us from the heart from those we hold dear.

Christmas is LOVE.

Winter beach babies!

Dear Muckers

Have you ever caught the spirit of a wild and windy day?

Buffeting you about like some clumsy, boisterous school boy.

It was me, Momma and Poppa and not another soul on the beach on a beautiful, blustery winters day.

Well thats not quite true there were lots and lots of birds, which I loved putting up!

This is how my day started..............

Momma did you just say the word "Beach?"

"50p for me cos I can see the sea!"

Eye on the prize

Windy Poppa? No way!

Is this my best side Momma?



Momma put that camera away and play!



Always time for a Poppa cuddle



Moody winter skies

Laughing like Momma!



Out came the sunshine!

Boy talk!

So typically Poppas lunch

So typically Momma's lunch

I shall remember this beautiful day, it was a perfect day and I am glad I spent it with you!

Love Radders xxx


P.S Radders,  Momma and Poppa also had a day to remember. Seeing you run with abandon is the most exhilarating, joyful sight and helped us realise that next year's destination is going to be a dream come true for you. xxx

...and so it is decreed

And so it is decreed that on 1st December, festive decorations will adorn the home and it is officially declared that Christmas songs will fill the air.

So it is decreed Chez T-J.

Every year, just like that.

But not this year.

"I dont feel like putting the tree up this year"

"Not sure I can be bothered with it"

"How can I put the tree up when I am just not feeling it?"

It is most perturbing, it has never happened before. But after a little thought, I have concluded that perhaps it's not at all surprising.

With so much on our plates right now, my head has concluded that something has to give, as my heart is being directed elsewhere and so maybe it needs to let something go.

But I am not letting go of Christmas, oh no far from it. No head I wont listen to you, my heart is surely big enough to fit everything in.

So 8th December it is decreed, stop being a bloody bah humbug and do your best girl.

So I did and I have.

Take my hand and come with me and creep along the hall

Hush! Step very softly, lets make no noised at all

Peep into the sitting room, oh what a pretty sight

The tree all shining in the magic of the moon's white light

Happy Christmas one and all, my last Crimbo in Blighty for a while. Rather than let my head rule my heart, my heart will rule my head instead as ever and so I decree.............................

CHRISTMAS HAS ARRIVED CHEZ T-J

Where the hell have you been? Bloody Australia?

Sincere apologies about the lack of blog for anyone who is even mildly interested.

Ha ha you had forgotten all about it hadnt you? You might have assumed I had too, but I hadnt. I have almost had too much to blog about, if that is possible.

It's true, brain racing faster than any fingers could type and not enough creative concentration to pin anything down.

It's full on, the roller coaster has reached its full ascent and we are now in free fall, looping the loop, no going back.

If you were at the greyhound track it would be a case of "the hare is on the move!"

Or if you were one of the wonderful penguins at Melbourne Aquarium, then you would say we were on the slide.

Indulge me in some "gorge" pics of the Penguins!

"Do not disturb" awww!

Proud Mama!

They were my favourite! As for the Octopus..................

he wasnt gifted with the pretty stick but I did tell him he is very tasty, in a garlic, panfried kind of way. Did you know the chap has 9 hearts or is that 9 brains? 9 something anyway - impressive I thought.

.... and so it is that I become so easily destracted and diverted from the task in hand, which is? I have no idea.

We are definitely moving to Melbourne. Our England home is on the market and our Australian one is still being elusive but its out there.

It's all under control Captain! The Hubster is out there right now, a man on a mission and truly on the case.

............and a bit of Melbournian street art sums it all up completely.

Life is a game of poker!

YOU'VE GOT TO KNOW WHEN TO STICK STU
KNOW WHEN TO RAISE REECE
KNOW WHEN TO PLAY COOL
KNOW WHEN YOU'RE THE ACE
YOU CAN COUNT ALL YOUR MONEY
WHEN YOU HAVE SANDBAGGED JOHNNY
THEN WE'LL HIT THE BEACH, HONEY
AND QUIT THIS RAT RACE
(extract from "One year as a professional poker player" by Anthony Holden)

Love this little excerpt cos............

Life is just like a game of poker.

Hold back, keep calm.

Take a risk, shield the harm.

Go random with sheer abandon.

Just know you are playing the game.

Somewhere on the other side of the world is my new home. It stands there, in all its physicality, I know not where it is but it is there all the same and that feels weird.

...........time to keep calm and then we'll hit the beach honey!